Day 23, Day 100 of the virus

Today is the 100th day since the Covid-19 came to be – and the 23rd day of lockdown for Stef and me. The weather took a turn for the better Monday, so I have been literally spending the day outside on the balcony. Stef has put lines on the ground and practices his chips and putts – I read, paint, nap, think of what to make for dinner that won’t add kilos – I’ve already gained one since lockdown started, and that is despite doing my exercisesand cadio workouts, so I really have to stop snacking every time I get bored.

Here is Auguste, lying on the finish line, looking at his portrait.

And here is my little corner of the balcony – it’s peaceful and there are buds on my rosebush. There is a pot of mint at my side too – and in another pot, lily of the valley are growing, so I may even have lily of the valley this year!

News of the virus – our neighbor’s father died. He was in an assisted living facility and became ill. The hospital refused to take him (no room left) so he was sent to a private clinic where he died very suddenly. They cannot have a funeral yet – the rules are vague – is it less than three people? Ten people? at any rate, it won’t be for a while. My boss says she knows four people who have died from the virus. Thankfully, so far, I don’t know anyone – I hope it stays that way. Keep your distance from everyone, wash hands, wear masks, and stay safe, dear readers!

Today’s project was washing my winter sweaters. Todays meal was tabouleh, carrots, and cheese for lunch, and for dinner I raided our freezer and found a tupperware of pulled wild boar shoulder – will serve it with mashed potatos and green salad. No desert! But maybe I will break down and bake a banana cake before Stef eats all the bananas.

Writing report : Have done practically no writing, even though at 7 pm each night we have a writing group that gets together (Avital Gad-Cykman’s idea – thank you so much!) She’s a wonderful writer, and I wish I were more productive, but just knowing there are a bunch of us together, stretched across the globe, is comforting and uplifting.

 

 

 

Day 20 -We try to write – it does not go well.

We’ve been in lockdown since March 15. It’s been hard not seeing my friends and children, hard not to take my bike and go to the river, and hard to only go out shopping once a week (I’m not very good at planning ahead, but this week I actually made a menu, and Stef was Thrilled!) He loves everything planned out and organized.

Auguste is still happy we’re home, and today, although it rained, the weather report says the rest of the week will be sunny, so I am looking forward to sitting on my balcony.

Since we have been in lockdown, I have been getting up early and fixing coffee and breakfast for Stef, feeding and walking the dog early morning. That is the world backwards, as he French say ‘le monde à l’envers’, because usually I’m a zombie in the morning and I take the dog out late at night. I still go to bed late – last night I was up until 3:30 am reading, but I bounced out of bed at the crack of dawn (well, when the sun peeped over the apartments facing us and shined into the window). Here are the views from my writing desk (I love it)

Here I am with my quarantine hair (I cut my own bangs and when I washed it, part of it stuck up – I was going to crop it out of the picture but I’m being honest here – I don’t do much makeup or hairdressing in lockdown.) Hey, at least I get dressed. 🙂

Today I wanted to get a chapter done on my new book, but I kept getting distracted by nothing at all – a fly on the window, three pigeons on the neighbor’s balcony, the people coming and going (dog walkers, a family outing, a man on a bike…), so the chapter is halted and the characters in my book will just have to sit down and wait for me to get back to them, as the ashes of Pompei’s volcano rain down upon them.

I read an article about two French authors who escaped to their country homes despite the orders not to. One was rhapsodising about how gorgous the countryside was, decribing the dew on the grass, the breeze in the trees, and the deer coming to eat in the garden, and the comment section was full of people saying “How very Marie Antoinette of you”, and I had to agree. If I were lucky enough to have a house in the country, and I had defied the lockdown to go there, I would be lying low, not preening and prattling on about how amazing it is. I wonder, would I have gone to the countryside if I could have? I don’t know. I’ll not deny missing a big garden, but our apartment building has a nice garden courtyard (even though Some residents let their dogs poop there and God help them if I ever catch them at it…) The town is small, and I like being able to walk down the street to get bread and our local grocery store is well stocked. So I am quite happy here. Plus there is my desk with my view, and it’s nice being able to finish my projects. My latest one was painting the wall in the entry that I’ve been longing to paint. Here it is!

Note the new, gold color on the wall. It used to be the white base coat that came with the apartent. Also note my little cabinet project that I put under the photos of the kids.

Day 18, 19 – Antony and Cleopatra

So the weekend slipped by and I didn’t see it go. The weather was beautiful, and we spent a long time on the balcony. Stef putting (or trying to putt – Auguste loved to chase the golf balls); me reading my Antony and Cleopatra.

I finished it yesterday and had to think about it for a while. It was a strange mixture of pathos and bathos, of bombastic speeches and truly touching love scenes. In this play, which is only awkward in that it spans many years and that cannot really be appreciated by just reading/listening to it, Antony and Cleopatra really do come to life as lovers. And it’s when Antony died that I completely lost it and had tears in my eyes (Although I did not cry, not Really – because at that moment Auguste tried to jump in my lap and I had to save my coffee.) And that is almost how I saw the whole play – just as you were about to succumb to violent emotion, you were pulled out of it by something ridiculous, something raunchy (this was a very raunchy play – and I thought ‘As You Like It’ was lewd…) so that your emotions are pulled this way and that – nearly laughing, nearly exasperated, almost crying, almost blushing… It was an interesting play to discover and if any of you has seen the mini series ‘Rome‘, I highly recommend this play – you see everything in a whole new light.

In other news my daughter’s German teacher, Gaby, called. She is a wonderful woman and an excellent teacher. She translated my book ‘The Promise’ into German (any German speakers out there, this is the link), and now a friend of hers is translating it into French, so we will soon have a French version!

As for the virus situation, I went shopping and waited in line. The store was full of products – no empty shelves – toilet paper, eggs, bread, chocolate (I’m saved – there is chocolate) and coffee (ditto). Everyone very polite and patient. Julia tells me that her neighborhood is not as well behaved. Also, poor Julia does not have a balcony, so I am feeling very sorry for her. Alex and SaraRachel went for a walk today – you can go outside for an hour as long as you stay within a 1 km radius of your house and stay far away from others.

I heard from one of my dearest friends that her son had a terrible epilepsy fit and is in the hospital, so we are all very worried and sending good thoughts his way. Alex & Sebi think of him as their little brother & we wish we could go and offer our support, but we have to do that from a distance. THIS is what makes the virus situation so hard. Not staying inside, not having to shop once a week, not being out of work – no, here in France, what makes it hard is not being able to hug friends and tell them you are there for them, because you Can’t be there for them – and that is the most difficult.

And finally, being locked in all day does not keep me from being silly.  Here I am, doing Cleopatra’s speeches. Here is the one where Antony dies, and here is Cleopatra telling Ceasar’s messenger she’ll never go to Rome. Ever. Over her dead body.

Tomorrow I start reading Richard III.

Take care everyone.

 

 

Day 17 & 18 – April Fools’ Day

Well, another bright and sunny day. My project is to read more of Antony and Cleopatra and listen at the same time.

I have started to repaint a small cabinet and will finish tomorrow. Probably the first time I let paint dry between coats; let’s make this last, folks!

Also on the agenda:

10 of the best travel podcasts (The Guardian, 1 April 2020) I intend to traval despite being stuck at home. Today I will descend into depths of the ocean in a great white shark cage. Wish me luck.

I will do my exercises with Daisy the bubbly blond and Erin the moody brunette, and I will make shrimp and garlic pasta for dinner. Oh, how the day flies by! If I can catch Cuomo online, that will be a plus – he’s my new crush.  (Don’t tell Stephane). I was wondering why I was coping so well, and then I saw this article and thought it resonated well – it says:

#GenX is Trending on Twitter Because of How They’re Handling Coronavirus—Here’s Why
MARCH 19, 2020
By KORIN MILLER @@korinmille

“Gen X tends to be, on the whole, seen as happy and balanced in work life, and active compared with other generations,” says Gail Saltz, M.D., an associate professor of psychiatry at the NY Presbyterian Hospital Weill-Cornell School of Medicine and host of “Personology” podcast from iHeartRadio.

Members of Gen X lived through things like the AIDS and crack epidemics, part of the civil rights movement, and recessions, and they came of age at a time when many households had both parents leave the house to go to work. “Many were latch key kids growing up, learned how to fend for themselves early, and have lower expectations in terms of being taken care of,” Saltz says. “They are noted for a heartiness and ability to soldier on.”

Well – that’s certainly a plus – go Gen X! We’ll show the world how to be a hermit.

Well, I hear Daisy and Erin calling – (or the voices in my head are getting very loud…)

Until tomorrow – take care, and wash your hands!

 

 

Day 13 – It’s a beautiful day

Today the sun shone brightly and I sat outside and read “As You Like It“, reading some passages outloud to my husband, who pretended polite interest (he really has to love me to put up with me quoting Shakespeare – especially as I was trying out different accents for each character.) But no, I am not Juliet Burton, who narrated my books The Road to Alexander and Legends of Persia so beautifully.

The news is terrible, so I stopped reading it today. Two things particularly distressed me – Trump allowing companies to pollute with no penalties, And Jeff Bezos making over 5 million dollars with just the stockmarket crash, as he dumps then buys stock. It’s obscene, it’s disgusting, it’s horrendous, unfair, and makes a mockery of anyone who is working to make a living. He’s slime. No, he’s a, as Shakespeare put it, a “trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years.”
Henry IV Part 1 (Act 2, Scene 4)

So I dug out my tarot cards again to see what is in store for us, and it doesn’t look good at all.  We were woefully unprepared (the 7 of wands) and the worst is right over our heads (the 10 of swords), but when it all dies down, there will much rejoicing (the 3 of cups) and it will include people from all over the world (the 5 of wands).  However, in order to get there, we we have to overcome individualism (6 of wands reversed) and work together. There will be a lot of deception and fake news (the 7 of swords). There were also the 9 and 10 of pentacles – two cards representing wealth – but the ten of pentacles was reversed, which represents the dark side of wealth, financial failure or loss. There are many, many people who will lose money. But there will be those who profit from the situation. It is going to be very important to share the wealth in the years that come, so that there is not a total collapse of government. The main card for this reading was the Hanged Man, which is the card of ultimate surrender, of being suspended in time, and of martyrdom and sacrifice to the greater good. The hanged man also represents a search for wisdom – and in this case I think we can say it’s representing not only the scientists searching for a cure, but the people working tirelessly in healthcare as well.

I cooked some brownies, so dinner tonight will be soup, with some warm brownies fresh out of the oven.  Tomorrow will mark two weeks confinement, and the government has just announced two weeks more. If anyone wants a tarot card reading, they can leave a comment on this post. Tell me simply how many times to shuffle the cards, then pick a number between one and three (representing the three piles of cards I’ll place – 1 left, 2 center, 3 right). I will give a quick reading and post it under your comment. 

 

 

 

Day 12 – As You Like It

We are on a road trip to nowhere, with no end in sight.  Today I went shopping, did my gym class with Daisy and Erin, and baked brownies.  I shopped at the Biocop, wtih organic food, and I bought grape juice, yogurt, honey, and eggs.  Yesterday, all day, I had a leg of wild boar in the slow cooker with homemade barbecue sauce, and tonight we’ll have the pulled wild boar meat with mashed potatoes. The meat is fork-tender and yummy. Brownies for desert. Hurrah!

I also spent a couple hourse on the balcony enjoying the sun and reading. I have started to read “As You Like It”, by Shakespeare, and it took me all morning to get through the introduction and prologue because it was so fascinating, and because I really don’t know anything about Shakespeare’s plays – especially this one. I have seen the play; I even have the DVD by Kenneth Brannagh, and enjoyed it (except for the Japanese theme in the beginning which always threw me), and now, reading the play, I think he made a mistake there but, hey – to each his own.

What is interesting about this play at this particular time is the context. Shakespeare wrote this play in the 1590’s, when England was going through a period of stress. Politically, things were stable, but “plagues and bad harvest were compounded by the dearth caused by the pursuit of gain […] and by landlords and usurers evicting or buying out their tenants from their holdings.”*  So there was a plague, food was scarce, and a ‘for profit’ mentality had begun to take hold that would shake the world order, starting with the rural dwellers, the farmers, and the small land owners.

This play can be seen as through a social magnifying glass – the nobles, the peasants, the myth (and distortion) of pastoral life – seen so often through the eyes of the wealthy who used the country as a sort of ‘fantasy’, the fantasy of the rich who imagine the shepherd or farmer as living in leisure while they work hard in the city. So the play takes place in a forest (in the most imaginary sense of the word) and the characters mostly come from the court (city). Everyone in the play is pretending to be someone else, women pretend to be men, men pretend to be women, nobles play the peasant, and the peasants are fine-spoken and polite. It’s an easy play to watch on the surface – but it demands a closer look. Shakespeare was a genius at showing people as they really are – no matter what disguises they wear.

As You Like It is a play within a play. It’s set in a political frame that pits ethical systems against status systems, and Shakespeare is enough of a cynic to make it clear in the end that no matter if the story ends well, it is a happily ever after riddled with “if’s”. As Hymen concludes, “If truth holds true contents” (5.4.114). Shakespeare knew he was living in the end of an era. This is surely one of his most joyous yet most pessimistic plays.

If you want to learn more, here is Dr Daniel Swift, giving an interesting lectureabout the play.

*John Walter and Keith Wrightson, Dearth and the social order in early modern England.

 

Day 11 – Sunshine on my balcony makes me happy…

This gallery contains 3 photos.

  Sunshine on my shoulders… John Denver

Day 10 – It’s not a war, folks. It’s nature.

As the virus spreads, the language around it has been changing. Out weak leaders, desperate to hold on to power, are not mincing words. They are now framing it as “the invisible enemy” and are claiming it’s a war against it. Macron repeated the word ‘War’ six times in his last speech. Trump has taken it up, using it in every press conference, visibly enjoying the sound of it coming from his flabby lips – “The invisible enemy”, he says, practically drooling over the words. “We’re at war, and America will win.”  I’m not sure he really understands what is happening.

The stockmarket tanked and that is bad news. People are losing jobs. People are losing money – they are worried, and it is heartbreaking to see that the US, with all that money it is prepared to inject into the system to prop up huge corporations, is not prepared to use that money to help it’s living, breathing, human population.  Europe is going to go broke – I’m sure of that. But you know, once you’re at rock bottom, you dig yourself out and you rebuild. But you have to be alive to do that. And you have to have the will, and the energy, and believe that you’re going to make a better world. I see Brazil, the US, and on the periphery, Russia – holding off, trying to decide – do they want to protect their system, their elite, or do they want to protect the people? (Imagine you’re in the Middle Ages, and the people are the serfs, dependent on the nobles… isn’t that how it is today? The serfs have no say in the matter.)

Over here in Europe, the serfs have some comfort knowing they will not lose their homes. Their jobs may disappear for a while, but they will be back, and until then, they will be paid enough to hopefully keep up their payments in order to keep home, car, telephone, and food in the house. When this is over, Europe will be on its knees. We’ll be broke. We’ll have to do without for a while – but we should still mostly all be here, and our system will have survived.

I’m less sure about the other three nations I’ve named, and I shudder to think of poor Africa when this virus gets a hold there, if it does. I’m hoping it is a cold-climate bug, and will not spread so easily in a hot climate. But nature is cruel, and capricious, and right now, Nature is pissed. So we had best hunker down, try to care for our neighbors, try some new recipes while we’re in quarantine, and forget the word ‘War’. Beause war means one side against the other, and the rich have already chosen their side, and the rich will sit by and watch the other side, the poor side, get wiped out. We lost this war ages ago. Maybe now it’s time to change the system. By the way, #NotDying4WallStreetis trending now on Twitter. Have fun with it. The economy is imaginary – people are real.

 

 

 

 

 

Day 9 – The exercise routine

I have to go back to the office every once in a while to check mail, get phone messages, and make sure the patients all have rescheduled their appointments. Today I went in for a while and did that, then dropped off a retainer for one of our patients at another dental office. Then I bought two loaves of French bread (warm from the oven) and went home. But once home, things got serious. We pushed the couch back, pulled the table away, and set up my computer where we could both see it. Then I put on our exercise videos ( yes, there are more than one – we are ambitious!)

The exercise class today was abs and legs, and Stef and I are getting better. We actually made it to the end without stopping, so we may try one that lasts more than five minutes tomorrow… (haha – just kidding.) We have a great exercise coach actually, he stands there are tells us what to do. In case we can’t figure it out, two girls are with him, Daisy and Erin, I think they’re called – and they are fabulously fit with six-pack abs and the tightest buns – in their hair – their hair is pulled back in tight buns. Anyhow, they are amazing, and I feel like a very mushy, wobbly person as I try to mimic their actions. I tell myelf that after only a few days, weeks, months – next year, If I keep it up, I’ll have muscles of steel like those women.

Our coach is very encouraging, and tells us how great we’re doing, even when I stop to put the dog on the balcony when he insists on lying down under my feet. “You’re doing great! Keep up the good work!” he crows, as I shove Auguste outside, toss him a doggy biscuit, and run back to my place.

Erin never smiles, and she punches, lifts, jumps, and presses with grim determination. Daisy has a wide grin, no matter how much her leg muscles must hurt – I keep waiting for her to grimace, or pant, (my face is beet red, my mouth wide open gasping for air, my glasses slipping off my nose…) Daisy just smiles and does another squat. Both girls are now my idols, along with Nancy Pelosi, Andrew Cuomo, Jacinda Ardern, and Ruth Bader Ginsburg, although you can all imagine who I’d rather look like. (Hint, it’s not Andrew).

I just added Andrew Cuomo because I saw his press conference again. I’ve watched him a few times, and his press conferences are the best things on television right now. He’s so calm, so clear, so – thoughtful. You can tell he’s thought about what he’s saying, unlike the orange clown in the white house who just opens his mouth and vomits whatever idiocies cross his itty bitty mind. Let’s make a switch – let’s put Cuomo in the president’s office, and put Trump in charge of on a plane to North Korea. We can even include his whole family.

Oh, Wouldn’t it be Loverly?

And if you’re tired of exercising, why not curl up with a good book? A Crown In Time

 

 

 

Day 8 – the tarot

In our family, the women have the reputation of being witches. It started with my great-grandmother, who used to put curses on things. She cursed a resevoire and it dried up. Because witchcraft is seen as something bad, we don’t talk about it much. But it has always been present in my life. I have no particular talents, I can’t fly on a broomstick, I can’t heal with my hands. I can’t see anything in the crystal ball my sister gave me for my wedding. But I can cast the cards, and about once a month I’ll sit down with the tarot deck my father gave me on my 14th birthday, and I’ll read the cards. It’s just for fun, although sometimes (often), I’ll ask questions about things that worry me – will my son pass his exam? Will my daughter like her new school? Will my husband’s heart valve operation go well? And the cards tell me, in their own way. Or perhaps it’s just my mind reading patterns and finding the answers. However, since this summer, things have been strange with the cards. I keep getting the same ones.

One day in August, I sat down with my daughter and we were fooling around, but it became apparent that no matter what we asked the usual suspects kept appearing: tower (upheaval, disasters), the devil (money, trade, greed), the five of wands (aggressions, fights), the ten of swords… I did a reading every month and it was always the same. The cards kept showing disaster. I cast the cards again today and got a history lesson. The cards are obviously in a teaching mode. For now, the cards seem bent on reporting the present – the future keeps changing but there are many cards signalling a stalemate that also show up – I’ll have to do a reading every day for a week and see how things change.

The last few readings I did were very interesting. Three queens and the Emperess showed up, as did the devil. The world is covered by the hierophant in a reversed position, which to me indicates that the actual leaders of the world are weak. The cards seem to be saying that three strong women will take control and redistribute wealth to the needy in a way that will satisfy nearly everyone. The cards keep ending in a stalemate though – nothing is resolved, but things will get better. After, however, we have to avoid going back to the same system as before – or things will get worse.

The companies asking for bailouts right now have to realize that they can no longer take taxpayers’ money (which belongs to the workers) and buy back shares to make their investors and CEOs rich. In fact, the 1% will be called on to bail out the workers. The top 1% who hold over 50% of the world’s wealth will come through, according to the cards, but it will be women who make this happen.

Here is one of my books, with an ad that used tarot cards  – note the tower and the ten of swords – both cards that you don’t want in your reading!

You can find Storms Over Babylon as in paperback or in ebook here