One of my twins once called the Olympics the ‘oh lick lips’. The twins were always mangling words, and I never corrected them, prefering ‘spalstic’ to plastic, and finding ‘hopper grasses’ much cuter than a grass hopper.

Anyhow, I love watching the olympics, and so yesterday I had the TV on while I worked, and I managed to catch the mens’ downhill and see the French guy win, much to the surprise of everyone. (it’s nicer when the winner is a surprise) And then I got a lot more work done during the cross-counrty ski race, (that lasts an hour and a half), since there are practically no commercials here in France. I managed to get a lot of work done because you see five minutes of cross country skiiing – you’ve seen it all.

I’m looking forward to the skiing and shooting race, which a journalist over at the Guardian likened to swimming a legnth of a pool, then getting out to strangle someone…That might be entertaining too, especially if the swimmer has to chase and catch his intended victim. (swimming, racing, and wrestling) But I happen to like sharp shooting, and the skiing helps me get a lot of work done while I don’t watch it.

And speaking of shooting, I read that the VP of the US, Cheney, shot someone while hunting quail. Now, I don’t hunt. But I grew up with a passle of hunting uncles, and my husband is an avid hunter. The VP shot someone in the face and chest, which meant he was shooting way low – birds fly in the air, folks, and unless you’re trigger happy and close your eyes when you shoot, you wait until the birds are high enough not to endanger anyone, you take your finger off the trigger as you raise that gun, and you don’t shoot unless you’re positive about what you’re shooting. What I’m trying to say is he is a terrible hunter, and since he shot a lawyer I bet he’s plenty ’embêté’ as they would say here in France, or down in New Orleans, come to think about it.

Now New Orleans, I just read, was a unmitigated disaster. Supposedly the levees were breached the day the storm hit, the Prez Knew about it and lied, saying they weren’t breached until a whole day and a half later. Is it to protect his buddies in the insurance companies? Or are they planning on submitting New Orleans’ candidature for the summer olympics and having a ready-made water park? I bet lots of folk wanted to swim out of New Orleans and strangle the president. He was smart not coming until a few days later. That can be a new sport – the swim, chase, and strangle. Right up there with the ski shooting.

Anyhow, one year the twins and I went to Mégève, a very lovely French ski station in the Alps. I put the twins in ski school. The teacher was an elderly man of infinite patience, who, it turned out, won the bronze medal for skiing at Squaw Valley in 1960. He also told me my son Sebi didn’t listen to a word he said, and that he’d never taught a child like that. I was mortified, but he honestly didn’t seem to mind. He just let Sebi do his thing (Sebi only wanted to be pointed straight down the mountain and go as fast as he could) while he took the others on their slow, curving way down the hill – and on the end of every curve he’d call Sebi, who’d point straight down and whoosh straight for the teacher, who would catch nimbly him and set him upright again, and tell him to wait. Sebi never did learn to turn, but he and the teacher got along great.